Along Came a Moonie
by Small Lady2
Summary: This is what happens when you give a couple of fans a teleportation device. I didn't write this all by myself; my friend helped.


Crystal and Michiko walked through Tokyo Park checking out all the cute guys. Both girls were licking their chocolate ice creams contently. They both sat under a tree in the shade of the hot day on a checked Picnic blanket.

"Ooh, he'll be here any minute now!" Michiko exclaimed. She slid her sunglasses up on her head scanning the park.

"Yep, we must meet Mamoru-chan!" Crystal replied. Michiko nodded in agreement, feeling quite hot from the heat.

"Oh my God, there he is!" Crystal cried out. Michiko spun her head in the direction in which Crystal pointed to and scrambled up off the blanket, Crystal close behind. Crystal grabbed the Frisbee they had in a bag and they ran up to the field, near from where he at on a bench reading a book.

"Now." Michiko nodded to Crystal, who set the Frisbee off at their target; Mamoru.

"Hey!" He cried out rubbing the back of his head. He set his book down on the bench and picked up the Frisbee. He straightened up, looking around him with a confused look on his face. 

"Perfect!" Crystal murmured. Michiko started to run up to him and Crystal followed.

"Oh, my God! I'm so sorry!" Michiko gushed. "Me and my friend were playing with our Frisbee and she threw it at the back of your head!" She touched his head where the Frisbee hit. "Will you be okay?"

"I-I'll live." He gave them a strange look.

"Say, now that you're here and we're here, could we maybe, oh get an autograph? Or a picture? Maybe a poster?" Within an instant Crystal whipped out a notepad and shoved it in his hand. Michiko turned to her whining.

"Crystal!" Michiko hissed in her friends ear, taking the smile off her face. 

"That's not fair!"

"Hey I'm the one who hit him with the Frisbee! I got us introduced!" She reorted.

"He can't sign both at once! Besides her likes me better!"

"Uh-" He started but was interrupted by an angry Michiko. She grabbed Mamoru-sama's arm and cuddled against it. Crystal growled, and got an idea.

"Don't worry, she's a bit, well, not right in the head. Sign, please." She gave a triumphant smile to Michiko. But Michiko shoved Crystal away, still clinging onto the cute boy's arm. The notepad fell to the floor.

"I-I'm gonna go now..." He started to pull his arm out of Michiko's grip.

"Nooo!" A cry escaped from both their mouths. Crystal lunged for his feet and grabbed hold of them.

"Hey-!" Mamoru cried out. Michiko flung herself at his chest and knocked him down to the ground.

"My autograph FIRST!" Michiko shouted out, causing people to stare at the three figures wrestling on the ground.

"Never!" bellowed Crystal. "Mamo-chan wants to sign my autograph first!"

"Nuh-uh, he-" Michiko suddenly slumped to the floor, revealing Crystal standing behind her holding a baseball bat.

"Now where did that come from?" Crystal whistled innocently, throwing aside her handy dandy slugger. She jumped into Mamoru's arms. "So how about a movie? I hear A Walk To Remember was great. Really romantic."

"I have to go," Mamoru started with a jump, thereby dropping the girl he held.

Crystal pouted for a moment then turned around and began to poke her friend. "Michiiiiiikooooooo. Wakie wakie"

Michiko sat up abruptly screaming, "COOKIE!"

"Nope sorry," said Crystal. "I only got Sour Patch Kids." 

"Sour Patch kids?!" exclaimed Michiko, eyes going impossibly wide. "I must have them!"

"I noticed," Crystal commented dryly, handing over the -ahem- emergency food rations.

"Well," said Michiko, around a mouthful of tangy morsels. "Did you notice that Mamo-chan's gone?"

"WHAT?!" screamed Crystal. 

"We better go," Said Michiko, swallowing the last of her tasty treat. He'll probably be at the Crown Arcade." She whipped out their map titled, 'The World of Sailor Moon' "That's about 2 miles from here. " Michiko sighed dreamily. "I bet I know what he'll order."

"Coffee, black!" sang out the two girls in unison

* * * .

"Rope?"

"Check"

"Tape?"

"Check"

"Dunk-a-roos?"

"Che- hey. wait a minute," the two girls in black ninja outfits stood outside the Crown Arcade. In broad daylight. Crystal noticed that they were getting some strange looks from passerbys. "WHAT?" she bellowed at them. "You're saved daily by girls wearing mini sailor skirt and a man wear a tuxedo and a cape and you think that we're strange for wearing ninja outfits?! GET A LIFE PEOPLE! These people make me sick," she muttered. She turned back to her friend. "Dunk-a-roo's, Michiko?"

"Dunk-a-roos?" pleaded Michiko with watery eyes.

"Fine," Crystal dug in her subspace pocket. "Here."

"DUNK-A-ROO'S!" screamed Michiko in ecstasy. She began to hop and sing "dunk-a-roos, dunk-dunk-dunk-aaaaaaaaaaa-rooooooooooooos, dunk-a-" 

Crystal put a stop to this madness by bopping Michiko on the head with a giant mallet. "Where are your priorities soldier?! Do you want a Mamo-chan?!" Michiko nodded meekly. "Then finish eating!"

Within two seconds, Michiko had scarfed down the packages contents. "Done!" she exclaimed.

"It's ok, Crystal," she muttered to herself. "Just breath in ....... and....... out."

"Whatcha doin'?" inquired Michiko.

"Meditating, so I don't blast you into oblivion." replied Crystal. "Ok, lets go."

With determined expressions on both of their faces, they marched into the Crown Arcade.

"Ok, here's the plan," Crystal muttered to Michiko. "You distract Motoki, while I grab Mamo-chan and-" 

"Why can't *you* distract Motoki while *I* grab Mamo-chan?" 

Crystal smiled sweetly. "Because *I'm* the one with an anvil in my sub-space pocket."

Michiko grinned. "Now that you mention it, I do have a bit of a headache."

"Not *Advil* you moron! *ANVIL*" Crystal hissed.

Michiko blinked. "Oh."

"Get to work."

Michiko skipped off leaving Crystal sweatdropping madly. 

Crystal slipped up behind Mamoru, and threw tape over his mouth. Next she tied up his arms and legs with rope. 

"Michiko!" she bellowed. "Let's go!"

"Bye, bye!"chirped Michiko happily. She pranced over to Mamoru and lifted his head as Crystal lifted his feet. With that they left the Crown Arcade.

"What are you doing with my Mamo-chan?!" a voice screamed from behind them.

"*Your* Mamo-chan?!" yelled Michiko. 

("Uh-oh" murmured Crystal)

"Did you get bonked on the head while trying to capture him? I don't think so! This is *our* Mamo-chan!"

Usagi sat down on the sidewalk with a plop and wailed. "Makoto! *Do* something!"

Makoto cracked her knuckles. "Right." She strode up to Crystal and flexed her muscles threateningly. "Are you going to give him back?"

"No you don't, Jupiter," muttered Michiko. "I *got* your number." She whipped out her cell phone. "And I've got something else, too.

"Freddy? If you can be here in 1 minute, I'll give you $1,000." That said, Michiko hung up.

Within seconds, a yellow ferrari drove up. A tall guy with brown hair and blue eyes hopped out.

"He looks like my old boyfriend," said Makoto with hearts in her eyes.

"Umm, Michiko?" said Crystal nervously. "Great plan, but, look," she pointed over Michiko's shoulder where, Usagi, Rei, Chibi-Usa, Minako, and even Ami (Makoto was still staring at Freddy) looked ready to commit mass murder to get their prince back.

"Chibi-Usa!" yelled Michiko. "Oh my god, I'm your biggest fan! Can I have your autograph?!"

"Umm... Michiko? Umm..."

"Yes, Crystal?" said the loony girl.

"RUN!"

And so, they had to dash, dragging their Mamo-chan behind them.

The moral of the story, you ask? Well, boys and girls, the moral of the story is *NEVER*, *EVER*, under *ANY* circumstances should you give two obsessed moonies a teleportation device. There's no telling what horrible, terrible things could happen.


End file.
